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Sunday, April 3, 2011

Charlie Sheen, LIVE!

Live on stage, ladies and gentlemen-- after all these weeks of anticipation! Charlie Sheen's Violent Torpedo of Truth Defeat is not an Option Tour opened last night in Detroit. Ever since word first came out about Sheen taking his train wreck talk show performances on the road, I was extremely curious as to how that was going to be translated into the sold-out stage show. It was said that the show would just be him, alone, on stage talking. Would he hire writers? Or would he go out and repeat the dumb shit that he's been saying in the 2-5 minute interviews, and try to extend that to a full 90 minutes?

Well, the speculation is over. And the verdict? Hey Charlie, rhymes with "Jew Chuck":

Well, the only thing "violent" in that theater was the reaction to Sheen. People walked out 10 minutes into the show (ouch). Also, he apparently claimed that there were going to be other people there, like Snoop Dogg; that did no happen, according to disappointed audience members. But seriously, what the hell were these people expecting? Did any of you rubes that bought tickets for this thing really expecting to be entertained? This guy is a clown! He's like many other personalities out there-- without a script, he is NOTHING. The guy goes on talk shows, rambles incoherently for a few minutes, gets play on YouTube, and you think that's worthy of buying tickets to this troll's stage show?

I don't blame Sheen, really. He has plenty of people enabling him, making him think that this bullshit was a great idea. Then there are the fools that went out and bought these tickets. I mean seriously-- he sold out Radio City Music Hall for TWO NIGHTS. Other than the Detroit, he has 20 more shows to go! At this point, these shows will be like going to a NASCAR race-- just a bunch of people waiting for a wreck.

Boy, I'm sure Charlie really misses his Chuck Lorre now. Where, oh where is "Hymie Levine" now, Carlos Irwin Esteves? Seems as if your show could really use someone with Mr. Lorre's talent. But someone with an ego as big as Sheen's, he probably thinks the reaction in Detroit was a one-time thing. In his mind, things will surely be better at the other shows...right?

I'll bet you not.

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